It’s Friday and I’m finally taking a break after being out every night this week. I’ve taken the bus the last two days, and I must say that I’m fully converted. No more CNGs for me, if I can help it! The bus is sometimes crowded, but it is safer for a lone foreign woman to travel on, especially at night. I always sit in the women’s section, so I can have good Bangla conversations with other women during the trip. It seems to be much less common for female strangers to just talk to each other on the street than it is for males, so this gives me an opportunity to make those connections. There is a bus that runs between Newmarket and Bashundhara, stopping everywhere else I usually go including Bashundhara City (near where my Language Partner lives) and Gulshan 1.
On Tuesday, I went to a wedding. Well, technically it wasn’t the wedding, but the betrothal ceremony known as a holud. In Bangla, “holud” means “yellow” and “turmeric;” in the ceremony, the guests smear a turmeric paste on the bride and/or groom’s forehead. Moumita invited Daniel and me to this holud, which was for the wedding of her brother’s friend’s brother. Holuds can be done either separately or individually; for this wedding, they were separate and we went to the bride’s holud. Moumita’s brother is good friends with the groom’s brother, so we were able to take part in the groom’s side activities. We first went to the groom’s parents’ house, where a lot of gifts were spread out on a bed. The women and girls from the groom’s side took these gifts and presented them at the bride’s ceremony. Daniel and I were welcomed and encouraged to participate. I carried the ornaments (= jewelry) with which they later adorned the bride during the ceremony. We got in the car and drove to Old Dhaka, where the bride was from. The ceremony was a traditional Old Dhaka wedding ceremony, which is different in some ways from the ones common in New Dhaka. It was held at a community center in Old Dhaka. As we walked up the stairs with the gifts, women and kids from the bride’s party threw some orange flowers at us. I was covered in petals by the time I arrived upstairs in the main room. There, there was a small stage with a couch and two chairs and a table, everything decorated with flowers. We placed the gifts on the stage and went upstairs to eat dinner. They served us heaping platters of goat biriyani. This was refreshed frequently; if the platter stopped steaming, no matter how much food was still on it, a new one replaced it. When we went back downstairs, the groom’s brother asked us to sit near the stage so the foreigners could see how everything was done. The bride then entered, surrounded by bridesmaids who were holding a veil above her head. In New Dhaka ceremonies, the bride would be fully adorned with jewelry, but in Old Dhaka she arrives without any jewelry at all. The party seated her on the stage, and two of her bridesmaids proceeded to dress her with all of the ornaments I had carried in earlier. When she was fully adorned, and after they stopped to take pictures, the anointing ceremony began. The guests, starting with the women, each came to the stage and sat on the couch to the bride’s left. Taking some turmeric paste from a bowl, they placed some on her forehead. Then they took either a grape or a spoonful of cake and fed it to her. (I used the cake.) Finally, an Old Dhaka tradition is to give money to the bride, so each guest placed some money in her hand. It was getting very late, so we each did this and then Moumita’s brother drove us back to Bashundhara. I was surprised how crowded it was in Old Dhaka after midnight.
On Wednesday, I went to the shopping mall Bashundhara City with my language partner, Afrida. I hadn’t quite realized just how large that mall is. It must be eight stories, with several wings and full of shops on every level. On the seventh level, there is an area called Deshi Dosh, where there are stores selling designer versions of traditional Bengali styles (including salwar kameez, panjabis, and saris). I bought a bag from a store called Shaddakalo (=Black and White) that has one of Rabindranath Tagore’s designs on it. We then wandered through the rest of the mall, looking at all the dress shops and some of the really expensive designer clothes stores. While Afrida was praying, I wandered into a sari shop and had a good Bengali conversation with the owner and employees. They weren’t trying to sell me anything, since I said that I was just looking today. After a few hours at the mall, I took the bus back to Bashundhara, having some good Bangla conversations on the way.
Thursday, after class and a lecture, I took another trip with Afrida. First, I had to meet her at her university, East-West University, in Rampura. I took a bus to get there, and had a good conversation with a female college student. She showed me the university campus, which was still under construction, and then we drove to Nilkhet, the book bazaar next to Newmarket. I’m trying to improve my reading ability, so she made me read all of the road signs on the way. (And I greatly appreciate this.) I wanted to go to Nilkhet for a very specific reason: I wanted to buy some elementary Bengali textbooks. That way I can work through them systematically and improve my reading comprehension and vocabulary. My reading ability at the moment is around the second or third grade level. My goal for the next year is to be able to read a contemporary Bengali novel by the end of my time in Kolkata. (This means I probably need to know around 10,000 words.) I bought the books for second through fourth grade, as well as some notebooks and other things that I needed. We then walked through the places selling salwar kameez sets, but didn’t buy anything. I then took the bus back to Gulshan Ek. It was Moumita’s birthday, so I went to her house and then out to dinner with her and several of her friends. We went to Pizza Hut. I was very proud of my Bangla abilities, because the others had a Bangla conversation for about an hour and a half and I was able to follow it – not exactly what they were saying, and I was too tired to try to participate, but I knew what was going on the whole time. Last year I met Moumita on her birthday and had only enough Bangla to say “how are you” and “my name is.” I am very impressed with this language program every time I realize how much I’ve learned.